there are approximately 1,013,913 words in the english language but i could never string any of them together to explain how much i want to hit you with a chair.
(Source: Flickr / beboflickr)
"wake up we gotta go"
my brother just looked at me and said, “so did you ever find your real parents?”
my life is one part “wait” and another part “what”
Everything you love is here
My dad and I were in a hotel and he tried the coffee and smiled and said “ahh, it’s like making love in a canoe.” and I said, “it’s that good?” and he stopped smiling and looked me in the eye and said, “no, it’s fucking close to water" before pouring it down the drain really dramatically and walking away.